Friday, January 29, 2010

You're Dead and I Feel Pretty!

So this is what I found out!

As far as I know, EVERY chick's anticipation when going to a funeral is: To get away with wearing as much make up as she could!
I never knew that until recently!
She might even not need any! Hell, she might even does not apply any to begin with!

The whole idea of a funeral in my humble point of view is to return you to the ground.
Remind you that when you are done, this is exactly where we are willing to put you.
To let me know that soon I will end up in dirt.
To remind me that no matter what I do I will end up being Worm fucked underground! BUTT NAKED TOO!
Can't you guys spare me some space in the garage? Maybe throw me in a fridge?
Shut Up, NO! We are already fed up with you so we are going to dig a hole and throw you there.
We know how much u hate sand in your hair and that is exactly what we are going to do to you!

Not that I have any hair, nor do I care what happens when I'm dead! At least then I would be judged by the only being that I would accept to be judged by!
But back to the chick thing!
Their main purpose, when it comes to funerals, is to wear as much make up as they can and get away with it!
You do not need make up! Hell you do not wear make up to begin with! Yeah but I would not want to be the only person who does not wear make up!
What would you want people to think? I'm a first degree relative of the deceased?!
Well the deceased was a nice person!
FUCK THE DEAD I'm going to wear my make up!
Does it look like I am wearing any?
Yes it does!
Well fuck you for noticing!
But the people there will not pay any attention! At least the relatives won't!
They'll be busy crying while I try and spot any obvious fellow make up artist over there so I can gossip about her insolence!
Maybe tell the family of the deceased how rude she was.

Funerals are hard to understand!
If I die do not bother coming to my burial nor my funeral!

If you really want to do something, you can start a charity fund! Send water to the thirsty people in Africa!
Better yet to the highway Bengal workers during summer. Or shoot the Bengalis. I don't care! Just don't come to my Funeral! But if you had to come, do not wear make up please!

ESPECIALLY if you were a guy!

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

true to that

Anonymous said...

lot's of mixed feelings!

Naser said...

yeah I'm complex..

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