Animals

I love animals!
Ivan the Terrible, 1st Czar of Russia, thought he was personally anointed by God to be the Ruler of Russia. He also enjoyed torturing animals as a kid.

I love fishes, mice, cats, cows, sheep, monkeys, peaches.. Wait peaches are fruits. Native to China too, Nihoa! But back to our subject. I want to start by giving few fun facts about Animals.

• A 'bitch' is more likely to bite you than a male dog. (No wonder they call her a bitch).
  
• Cows have 4 stomachs. (That's like how many hot dogs?)
  
• A zebra is white with black stripes. (Isn't that supposedly politically incorrect?)
  
• Sharks are immune to cancer. (FIND THE REASON AND THE CURE, please!)
  
• A snail can have about 25,000 teeth.
• A pig's orgasm lasts for 30 minutes. (I so wanna be a pig!)
  
• The male praying mantis cannot copulate while its head is attached to its body. The female initiates sex by ripping the male's head off. (I think I once knew a praying mantis.)
  
• Abalones are a type of snail with five assholes. (If all else fails, start ripping people more assholes than an Abalone.)

Now, you know what I used to really like?

Mice, I loved feeding them to the piranhas! That was long before I vowed not to kill any animal, unless I'm going to eat it.



Fun things to do with mice:

1- Watch them swim, (its legs move like turbines.)
2- Scare them shitless, LITERALLY!

Notice how we scared that poor animal until it shat it self!
So, does that mean we scared it shitfull or shitless?
But back to my valuable pointers!

3- Feed it to the Piranhas!



If you never seen a delicious mouse being grotesquely devoured by a school of piranhas, you're missing half your life. A very fun experiment. (R.I.P. Mouse!).

P.S. That was long before I vowed not to hurt anything.
P.S.S. Some animals were harmed in the making of this post.
P.S.S.S Never EVER name an animal before killing it, it's just gonna make things a little bit complicated.
P.S.S.S.S. Don't ask about my childhood.